I’m a third year and had my first major sob sesh/breakdown today. I got staffed on two major deals that are both blowing up and I’ve been underwater all day yesterday and today (billed 18 hours yesterday and on track to do that over the weekend too).
A mid level asked me to do a small thing that would be super quick (and it honestly would have been). She’s really great and I love working with her, and I told her how I genuinely have no time to do it at the moment and wouldn’t be able to do it until tomorrow.
She just said “we’re all busy.” And like I get she probably just meant it nicely and actually is busy, but I just felt like I’m dropping the ball even when I’m working this much. Like honestly the comment wasn’t even that bad, but combined with the exhaustion it just set me off and I ugly sobbed for a solid few minutes.
I haven’t cried like that in years. Really feeling like I’m at the bottom of the barrel rn. Not asking for sympathy, just speaking to the masses thatve been through it.
EDIT: Thank you all so much. I genuinely cried some more reading yalls comments, it was exactly what I needed to hear. It sucks that this is just the life we accept for ourselves. Also, the mid level ended up handling the thing and I apologized to her for not getting on it quick enough. She was really sweet about it and said “all good, that’s why we have layers in our team, we have to support each other.” I was definitely in my feels and the cry sesh did help a little bit, but damn this job sucks lol