Curious to sanity check what “normal” looks like for those in BigLaw and on partner-track (or with partners in it).
For context, I used to be in BigLaw myself, so I fully get the hours, unpredictability, and general mental load. I’ve since moved into a slightly less intense role, which gives me more flexibility at home. My partner is on the partner track at a big firm and is extremely busy.
We’ve been together for years and are very solid — this isn’t coming from insecurity, more just wanting to make sure we’re building something sustainable and not drifting into just co-existing.
We try to aim for a Saturday date night, but it’s not always possible. During the week it’s more low-key (quick dinners, walk to work together, etc.).
I also naturally take on more at home — I even food prep for my partner for the whole week so we both stay healthy (we’re both quite into fitness), and while we do have a cleaner, I still do a fair amount myself as we don’t have a full-time housekeeper.
So a few questions:
• Do you manage a regular date night (weekly / every other week / more ad hoc)?
• What does a “normal” week look like at home for you?
• How is household work typically split in your setup?
• How do you balance being supportive vs. still protecting time for the relationship?
Would really appreciate hearing what’s worked (or not worked) for others in similar situations!