If this is one of you can you just tell me? Kind of freaking out. I deleted the post just in case.
Dear Reddit User "CallkeyKibret",
I am a partner at a global law firm, writing on behalf of a person whom you recently targeted in a defamatory Reddit post on the biglaw subreddit. Your post maliciously mischaracterizes a selectively cropped 2018 email exchange to falsely insinuate that my client lacks professional integrity and trades legal access for luxury footwear.
We have deliberately chosen to withhold our firm's name and my client's identity in this correspondence to afford you the opportunity to quietly rectify your misconduct without triggering further public spectacle, known as the "Streisand Effect." Do not mistake this strategic anonymity for an inability or unwillingness to act decisively. We have already preserved forensic copies of your publication, its metadata, and all associated commentary. This letter serves as a formal demand that you immediately delete this post and cease any further publication of disparaging material concerning my client. You have crossed the line from idle internet gossip into severe, actionable civil liability.
Your publication exposes you to catastrophic liability for defamation per se under New York law. By explicitly asserting that my client's professional judgment could be swayed by expensive shoes and framing innocent pleasantries as unethical complicity, you have published false statements that directly injure her in her trade and profession. The New York Court of Appeals established in Liberman v. Gelstein, 80 N.Y.2d 429 (1992), that statements impugning an individual's professional competence or integrity are defamatory per se, requiring no proof of special damages.
Your commentary attempts to disguise baseless accusations of professional misconduct as mere opinion, which offers absolutely no legal shield. A jury will easily recognize your narrative as a deliberate character assassination calculated to destroy a stellar legal reputation.
In addition to defamation, your deliberate choice to publish this attack in a forum dedicated to the elite legal profession provides grounds for tortious interference with prospective economic advantage. As articulated in Carvel Corp. v. Noonan, 3 N.Y.3d 182 (2004), this tort occurs when a defendant intentionally interferes with a plaintiff's business relationships using wrongful means to maliciously inflict economic harm. By broadcasting these baseless insinuations to an audience of industry peers, you are wrongfully attempting to poison the well and damage my client's relationships with current and prospective partners or clients.
Furthermore, your unexcused conduct exposes you to liability for a prima facie tort under New York law. By publishing this thread with the malicious intent to inflict reputational harm without any legitimate justification, you meet the strict criteria for this cause of action under Freihofer v. Hearst Corp., 65 N.Y.2d 135 (1985). Your sole motivation is disinterested malevolence, and we will hold you financially accountable for these targeted, tortious acts.
You cannot hide behind the veil of internet anonymity or geographical distance to evade the jurisdiction of the legal system. Subject matter jurisdiction refers to a court's fundamental statutory or constitutional authority to hear a specific type of legal dispute.
The New York State Supreme Court is a court of general jurisdiction with the absolute authority to adjudicate these civil tort claims. Personal jurisdiction, meanwhile, dictates the court's power to bind you as an individual defendant to its judgments, regardless of your physical location. Even if you reside entirely outside of New York State, our courts will exercise personal jurisdiction over you pursuant to the state's long-arm statute, CPLR ยง 302(a). By intentionally committing tortious acts that you knew or should have known would cause severe reputational injury to a high-profile professional operating in New York, you have purposefully availed yourself of this forum. You will be legally compelled to defend yourself in a New York courtroom.
This communication serves as your first, only, and final warning to permanently remove the offending post and refrain from any future commentary regarding my client. We possess the resources and legal mechanisms necessary to obtain a John Doe subpoena against Reddit to unmask your IP address, subscriber information, and ultimate identity.
If this matter proceeds to litigation, we will aggressively seek maximum compensatory and punitive damages, along with the reimbursement of our extensive legal fees. You have exactly twenty-four hours from the reading of this notice to delete the publication in its entirety. If you fail to comply, we will execute discovery to strip you of your anonymity and pursue you to the fullest extent of the law. Govern yourself accordingly.
Sincerely,